Friday, April 27, 2007

Shelley Moore Capito disappoints Turbonerd

OMG, OMG, Oh. My. Gawd. This comment is so long it deserves its own post:

Dear Tiffany:

I know it's been barely a week, but I have to admit some disappointment that Rep. Shelley Moore Capito has not responded to your excellent suggestion regarding "Christian Republican Orphan's Club offering Sisterly Helping In Time" (C.R.O.C.o.S.H.i.T.).

Undoubtedly Rep. Shelley Moore Capito has been busy supporting the resolution to express support for the excellent National Foster Parents Day, and possibly even serious, but icky things like National Crime Victims' Rights Week and National Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month (although how, exactly, those expressions of support mesh with your organization's insistence on maintaining standards of flawless physical beauty, as well as regular interaction with fraternity boys besotted with both your looks and copious amounts of alcohol, defy logical explanation. Oh well. Just one more reason why she is Shelley Moore Capito, the bestest Representative from West Virginia ever, and we are not.)

But I wonder if another reason for her non-response to your thoughtful invitation to become a founding founder of C.R.O.C.o.S.H.i.T. is, in fact, that the Supremes' decision relates - properly, of course, in a strict-interpretation sort of way - to only one procedure, and a procedure that Congress made up in order to express the proper level of moral outrage over disgusting, if non-existent, abortion procedures.

The problem being that Justice-for-Life Kennedy's fatwa didn't QUITE outlaw abortions wholesale, just this one extremely rare, possibly mythical, although admittedly gruesome, procedure. For example, aborting a second trimester fetus through dismemberment in the womb is still quite legal, although not as safe as the D&X procedure to which legendary "partial birth abortion" is an homage. So it's not at all clear that the less than one percent of abortions now performed in the second trimester will instantly transmogrify into adoptable babies.

Not to mention that many of those babies would be b-l-a-c-k. While they ARE "colored," it is still MUCH more fashionable to adopt a Chinese baby. (At least for the moment; those "in the know" seem to be indicating that the proper "accessory adoption" locale will be changing soon to India, as those babies already know how to speak English.)

Please do let us know how Rep. Moore Capito responds, as I am quite sure that the bestest ever Representative from West Virginia has many thoughtful and insightful comments about reproductive freedom that are sure to be of interest to a wider audience than just the Sisters of Sigma Mu Capito - not that I don't love you all, in a Biblically-approved way. (I would say "platonic" but that has the whiff of Greekiness to it, and you know what Leviticus says about that.)

Best regards, Turbonerd!

I think Turbonerd is sweet on me. :) :) Too bad for the icky name of TurboNerd, there goes an invite to the May Formal. Why do all the guys with three syllable words have to be such major geeks?

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